Chat and Flirt

Modern dating advice for the internet.

Monday

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September 2014

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Are You Interested Achieves #1 Grossing Ranking in iTunes

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SNAP Interactive has made its online dating site Are You Interested (AYI) a priority, and it looks like it’s paying off. The company announced that AYI has become the number one grossing application in US Lifestyle category in the Apple iTunes Store as of August.

The company hit other big milestones, too. In July, its mobile apps contributed to the highest percentage of total logins ever, at 38%. New mobile subscription transactions were up 57% year-to-date compared to the same period in 2013, and total mobile logins were up 33% YTD compared to the same period in 2013.

AYI began as a Facebook-based online dating site, and has since expanded to its service to develop its mobile platform. SNAP said that it has put a huge focus on mobile in the past year, specifically improving the user experience for iPad, iPhone, and Android phones. The goal was to create a seamless cross-platform experience for everyone, no matter what device they were using.

Mobile ...

Saturday

30

August 2014

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New Dating App Siren Puts Women in Control

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For the single women reading, how many lewd messages have you received on OkCupid in the past month? How many guys have stalked you over Tinder? If you answer “too many” for either one, you might be ready for a new kind of dating app called Siren.

Siren is an alternative to the typical dating apps like Tinder, where many men swipe right to have more women in their cue - meaning, they play the numbers. They make the first move, often approaching women in a way that makes them feel pressured, uncomfortable, or just plain creeped out. It’s become a kind of risky game for some women, where they aren’t sure if they will meet someone and feel safe. If they don’t, the whole dating app experience becomes tainted.

This has ...

Friday

29

August 2014

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Is There A Magic Formula For Online Dating Success?

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All of us, at least once, no matter how much we profess to love dating, have wished we could just snap our fingers and magically make the perfect partner appear.

Well…I have good news and I have bad news. The good news is that researchers at the University of Iowa believe they may have found the secret to online dating success. The bad news is that no magic is involved, and snapping your fingers probably won’t help.

The key, says the University of Iowa team, is for online dating sites to match users based on their past interests and actions, rather than on what they say they’re interested in. Think about your Netflix account. Netflix recommends movies based on what you’ve watched and the amount of time you spent watching it – so even if you profess to be a documentary lover, if all you watch is Gossip Girl, Netflix is probably going to suggest more CW-style teen dramedies.

The online dating algorithm developed by Kang Zhao, an assi ...

Thursday

28

August 2014

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How To Date Like A Social Scientist: Part II

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Love and attraction are about as inexplicable as it gets, but that doesn’t mean scientists aren’t determined to try. More and more studies are attempting to uncover the secrets of attraction, especially when it comes to dating online, the big question being: if we figure out how the process works, can we learn to hack it?

Eli Finkel and Paul Eastwick of Northwestern University are two of the researchers studying online dating. In a breakthrough 2008 study, the duo found that, although men and women say they look for different things in a mate (men tend to prioritize looks, while women prioritize money), there’s no difference in the types of partners the two sexes actually choose in real life.

Finkel and Eastwick took their research farther, finding that there’s little association between the traits people claim that want in a partner and what they are actually attracted to when they meet potential dates face to face. In othe ...

Wednesday

27

August 2014

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15 Ways to Be a Great Friend

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It’s said that the quality of our lives is largely determined by the quality of our friendships. Your traveling companions on the journey of life can pick you up when you fall, bring out your best, and propel you forward.

The surest way to have great friendships is to be a great friend. The bonus is that the skills you develop will translate well to your love life. In that spirit, we offer the following simple yet powerful ways to be a wonderful friend:

1. Build trust. For all relationships—friends, lovers, coworkers—consistent demonstrations of trustworthiness form the bond that holds people together.

2. Be there. Show up, physically and emotionally, for all of your friend’s important events (and unimportant ones, too).

3. Practice positivity. Optimism beats pessimism hands’ down—and your friend will benefit from your upbeat attitude.

4. Initiate consistently. Don’t wait for the other person to text or call you—take the initiative yourself.

5. Cultivate transparency. Openness begets openness, so share from your heart and you’ll receive the same.

6. Affirm differences. Celebrate the other person’s unique beliefs and lifestyle, even when they happen to conflict with your own.

7. Learn the art of listening. Focus on your friend’s words with open ears and an open heart.

8. Give generously. Pick up the tab, send a gift for no reason, offer to help move. A generous spirit will come back to you in unexpected ways.

9. Make the time. Overcrowded schedules crowd out friendships—and very few items on your schedule are worth that.

10. Empathize. Let your friend know you understand and relate to what he/she shares with you.

11. Peel the onion. Make the effort to dig deep into the other person’s life to discover what lies below the surface.

12. Accept the ebb and flow. Friendships go through times of closeness and times of distance. Stay committed throughout.

13. Compliment often. Identify the areas of your friend’s awesomeness and mention them whenever possible.

14. Apologize when you blow it. A sincere apology is the quickest and surest way to smooth over rough patches.

15. Create new memories. Meeting at the same old coffee joint to catch up is fine, but friendships are deepened through shared adventure and discovery.

What others way can you be a great friend?

The post 15 Ways to Be a Great Friend appeared first on eHarmony Advice.

Wednesday

27

August 2014

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Tech-Saavy Users are Manipulating Tinder for more Dates

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Like with online dating, Tinder seems to give females the advantage over males, at least in terms of your chances for getting a date.

Many guys complain that women have it better in the dating world because women can choose who they want to date, while guys are left saying "yes" to every woman's profile they view online or on an app like Tinder, just to improve their chances of meeting someone. (Women tend to be more picky, and say "no" to most men, probably because so many men just swipe right to everyone.) While online dating does seem skewed, apparently some tech geniuses have decided to make the odds work in the guys' favor.

Instead of manually going through all the matches Tinder sends his way, one techie decided that he could automate responses. According to website ValleyWag, former Microsoft developer Yuri de Souza details "how he reverse engineered Tinder to mass-like every girl on the network." He was sitting around one Sunday afternoon min ...

Tuesday

26

August 2014

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COMMENTS

15 Reasons to Date a Lefty

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We all know by now that left-handed folks aren’t of the devil, right?! Here are 15 reasons to date an amazing lefty.

1. If your date’s a lefty and you’re right-handed, you can hold non-dominant hands while eating dinner — or filling out paperwork.

2. Maybe it’s because they’re living in a right-handed world, but lefties excel at thinking outside the box. According to Slate, “There may be an outsize number of lefty geniuses because lefties are more likely to engage in divergent thinking.”

3. Yep, they’re super-smart. Bill Gates, Aristotle and Marie Curie: all left-handed. Despite representing only 11 percent of the American population, about 20 per cent of Mensa‘s members are southpaws. There are a disproportionate number of left-handed Nobel Prize winners, too.

4. Not that you care…but college-educated left-handed men bring home a little more of the bacon than their right-handed counterparts. (See Bill Gates, above.)

5. You’ll be dating someone fit for leadership. In fact, the only non-lefty in the White House since the Cold War has been George W. Bush. (Alexander the Great, Joan of Arc and Napoleon Bonaparte were all rumored to be left-handed, too.)

6. The “lefty advantage.” Lefties have advantages in sports. Opponents aren’t used to facing a lefty’s serve (tennis) or punch (boxing). About 25 percent of pro baseball players are left-handed, and southpaws can better adjust to seeing underwater. You’ll want your date on your team.

7. Your date won’t steal your scissors. He has his own. (But if he can use your scissors, it’s because he’s adapted some ambidextrous habits. Impressive, huh?)

8. They get stuff done. Lefties are proven multitaskers. In fact, lefties “tend to have a more even distribution of mental activity across the two hemispheres of the brain,” says Dr. Clyde Francks from the Wellcome Trust Centre for Human Genetics at the University of Oxford. “This may make lefties better at organizing vast amounts of information and multitasking, since the two sides of their brain are accustomed to communicating more efficiently.”

9. When watching movies at home on the couch, you’ll each get your own armrest — and can still share the bowl of popcorn.

10. If your date ever ends up in a Zoolander-esque walk-off, he’ll be able to nail that left turn.

11. Lefties are visual and creative. Michelangelo, Raphael, Leonardo da Vinci and Renoir were all left-handed. So is Paul McCartney. One study found that participants just needed to clench their left hands to boost creativity.

12. Lefties are also natural performers, which is likely why so many of our A-list favorites sign autographs with their left hands, including Angelina Jolie, Tina Fey, Bruce Willis, Emma Thompson, Julia Roberts, Jerry Seinfeld, Oprah, Hugh Jackman, Whoopi Goldberg, Nicole Kidman, and Morgan Freeman.

13. He’ll get you home safely. Apparently lefties are better at learning to drive — at least in the U.K., where the gearshift is to the left of the driver. Famous left-handed drivers are pretty out-of-this-world: Buzz Aldrin and Chewbacca.

14. Fun fact: Your date can probably pick up a few groceries faster than you can. Studies have shown that shoppers line up at the checkout nearest to their dominant side. The left lane is usually emptiest.

15. And because we know you were wondering: Lefties are better off in the bedroom. According to a 2014 survey, left-handed people are 71 percent more satisfied in bed than right-handed people. Now you know.

Why else should one date a lefty?

The post 15 Reasons to Date a Lefty appeared first on eHarmony Advice.

Tuesday

26

August 2014

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COMMENTS

Dating site Ashley Madison Cheating on its Own Users

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Ashley Madison, the infamous dating website that makes its revenue from matching married people looking for affairs, has now admitted to spying on its own users.

A recent study published by the company was gathered from emails the sites’ users sent to each other under what they assumed was a condition of anonymity. According to a recent article in Time Magazine, Eric Anderson, a professor at the University of Winchester in England who conducted the study, claims that “women who seek extra-marital affairs usually still love their husbands and are cheating instead of divorcing, because they need more passion.”

“It is very clear that our model of having sex and love with just one other person for life has failed— and it has failed massively,” Anderson tells Time.

As it turns out, Ashlay Madison seems to have commissioned this study to boost its membership numbers - that is, to prove that almost every ...

Monday

25

August 2014

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COMMENTS

What Do Men Really Mean When They Text You?

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Dating is a mystery, even for those who have been doing it for a while. Men and women misunderstand each other all the time when they are in relationships, so it’s only natural that communication problems would occur while you are just getting to know each other. Even before the first date!

Texting is a great tool to help us keep in touch, but it’s also created a whole new level of second-guessing and misunderstanding when it comes to dating. How many times have you stared at a text, trying to interpret it – even if it’s only “hey, what’s up?” We might think – is he asking me because he wants to see if I’m busy, or is he just being casual and reaching out to say hello? Then we might wonder: when should I text him back? Should I wait another five minutes, another hour, another day??

We drive ourselves nuts sometimes trying to figure out what’s going on in someone else’s head. But the truth is very simple: we don’t know. We can’t make assumpti ...

Sunday

24

August 2014

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COMMENTS

How To Date Like A Social Scientist: Part I

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There is quite possibly nothing in this world that perplexes us more than that strange collection of physical and emotional responses we call love. Humans have been trying to understand it since the dawn of…well…humans, in poetry, in art, in music, and in laboratories.

Writer Olga Khazan, in an article for The Atlantic, explores recent research being done into the murky, inexplicable world of online dating. These studies are designed to determine “what makes people desire each other digitally,” she writes, “as well as whether our first impressions of online photos ultimately matter.”

What do social scientists know that you don’t?

First, your face plays an important role in your romantic fate – which means yes, your photos matt ...